I recently received an email from a girl in an AMWF relationship, trying to decide whether her boyfriend should move to Europe with her or if she should move to Asia with him. Being concerned about the way people would treat their relationship in her country compared to his, she included a very interesting question “Why do so many AMWF couples live in Asia?”, or more specifically:
“Why is it that so often Western Woman follow Asian Men home, rather than the other way around?”
There are many pros and cons of moving to another country or staying in your own which differ with each person, so what makes western women choose to move to Asia? Is it the personality of woman who chose an AMWF relationship, a stronger sense of adventure, a lower sense of family commitments?
Here are some possible reasons I’ve thought of as to why AMWF couples tend to move towards the Asian countries to live are:
1. The woman travelled to the Asian country in the first place, then she met a guy, and decided to stay.
2. Westerners in general have a stronger urge to travel and experience new things than Asians. (very stereotypical)
3. Asian culture is very family orientated. The man and his family don’t want him to leave which means the woman has little choice if they want the relationship to continue.
4. Asian culture is more accepting of AMWF relationships than western culture. (debatable)
5. Asian countries are better economically, with more employment opportunities for foreigners, cheaper costs of living and therefore more disposable income. It’s harder for an Asian man to get a good job in a western country.
6. Asian countries are generally more expat friendly.
7. Asian countries have a high quality of life and better weather. (depending on the country and what sort of weather you like!)
8. This isn’t a true statement, it just so happens that the woman who move to Asian countries blog more/comment more on the internet.
I feel like I am in the minority. My boyfriend followed me home. It is possible my situation is rather different than others, as it involved choosing between the North and the South of England rather than 2 different countries. My boyfriend moved from Hong Kong to the UK with his parents, long before he met me. While he may technically be an expat, he comes from a country which, before he left, was a British colony.
I never really considered staying in the North after I left university, even though I was dating him. I’m very close to my family in a way my boyfriend doesn’t seem to be with his own and I always wanted to go home. In the end we came to the conclusion that I would be happier going back to the South than he would be staying in the North, and he would be happier to come to the South than I would ever be staying in the North.
It’s a completely different story with other countries though. While I could have managed living in the North, I would never in 1,000,000 years have been able to move to Hong Kong. This doesn’t seem to be the case with many AMWF couples though. From my time writing on this blog, I’ve noticed the vast majority of people I come across in AMWF relationships either moved to Asia and met a guy or met a guy, had a long distance relationship then moved to Asia. There are obviously a lot of AMWF couples in Western countries too, but I tend to find that a fair few of the Asian men have been in the Western country for all their lives, or moved at a young age with their parents.
Another interesting consideration would be – does this trend purely relate to AMWF couples? Is it gender based rather than relating to race? Are women more likely to follow a man half way around the world than a man would follow a woman?
This is where all you guys come in. I’ve made a little survey primarily for AMWF couples so we can find out a bit more. Please respond in the comments and spread this around. (If you’re in any interracial relationship, not just in an AMWF relationship, please still respond. It will be interesting to look at this from a gender point of view.)
1. Firstly, what is your gender and what sort of relationship are you in?
2. Which countries have you and your partner lived in together? – Woman’s, Man’s, Other
3. Where is/Where do you anticipate your permanent residence to be? – the woman’s home country, the man’s home country, a completely different country or unsure?
4. Why have you chosen this country to live in?
5. Do you think white women are more likely to live in the home country of their Asian partner than vice versa, and why?
6. What are your opinions on the idea that women are more likely to follow men to another country?
Looking forward to the responses!